BANGKOK – In a speech to the American Chamber of Commerce yesterday, Prime Minister Abhisit Vejjajiva proudly announced the creation of over 250,000 new public sector jobs in the first quarter of 2009, including 247,000 full-time web censors at the Ministry of Information and Communications.

An additional 3,000 jobs were added in the plastic water bottle, foot-shaped clapper, and flip-flop recycling industries. Unemployment figures for the quarter fell by a full 4.2%.

The Ministry of Information and Communications has now hired approximately .4% of Thailand’s population. A newly allocated budget of 45 billion baht will go to the building of warehouse facilities to house the new workers, as well as pay for a quarter million PCs and a new T3 connection to the CAT backbone.

“In defending the King’s name, no expense must be spared,” explained MICT head Ranongruk Suwanchawee. “With 247,000 loyal Thais monitoring the web for content that threatens national security 24 hours a day, we can feel safer. Also it creates good jobs for people who might otherwise turn to low-paying farming or factory work. We have Burmese and Cambodians for that.”